Relationships are sometimes tricky things, but they don’t really have to be. The trick is to keep growing. To keep learning each other and yourself along the way! The thing that they do not tell us when we are young and in love is that we change, and we keep changing until the end of time! The person you are in love with today is not who they will be in five, ten, fifteen months or years from now. Life happens, we grow. Life gets hard, we grow. Life gets adventurous, we grow.
Each time we grow we become better versions of ourselves. Sure, there are some unique things about us that stay with us for the rest of our lives, but, through years of learning, making mistakes, and having wins, we become this amazing ever renewing creation. We are always growing, through the good times and the bad. It’s all growth! It’s very simple….
If we are not growing, we are dying.
Sometimes we feel we come to a grinding halt in our lives, but maybe it’s a wall we need to climb. The world doesn’t ever stop. If we do, the world passes us by and we get left behind. Same goes for our relationships. We have to…
Grow together or we will grow apart.
Think about how much a child changes every 2 years. Drastically right? Somehow as adults, we think that we just stop changing at a certain age. Truth is, we just stopped paying attention. It is impossible to stay the same!
The one thing that remains the same…
is that everything changes.
The more we grow the more we change. Couples should be on a continual self-discovery journey together. Daily learning new things about one another. Talking together, dreaming together, learning new things together, taking classes together! ASK QUESTIONS! Each year should be marked by amazing growth and changes and new goals set! As we grow our passions change, the stage we are in changes, times change, trends change, taste buds even change! If we want to stay a couple, we should be learning each other over and over again. The person we fall in love with will be a completely different person down the road. Don’t lose them. Keep learning them! We have to also keep learning ourselves! So that we can help others to learn the new and improved you.
Our thoughts change,
our words change,
our actions change.
Our bodies change, our health changes, our family changes. Welcome the changes, Love the changes, LIVE THE CHANGES! Change is good, it refreshes the soul, the relationship, the adventure!
Change means Adventure!
I challenge you today to CHANGE WITH INTENTION. Change with purpose. Learn your loved one all over again, as if it was the first date or the first month. Learn how they have changed, grown. I believe we don’t fall out of love, I believe we choose to stop falling in love. It is a constant beautiful work of art! It is forever changing, growing and takes constant learning and effort! If we are not feeling connected to the people in our lives, we have stopped learning who they are, stopped sharing who we are. Every day we change and grow. Maybe you have forgotten to share who you are now?
Learn the new you,
then share it with the world.
Learn your new spouse, your kids, your friends. Pay attention to how they have changed and grown over the years. Reminiscing of the good old days is a great place to start, but dream about some good days to come together and make it a reality. Start by setting goals, reading books together, take a dance or art or whatever class together!
Remember you are not the same person as you were back then and neither are they. Fall in love with them all over again. Fall in love with YOU all over again. Learn to love the scars, the wrinkles, the gray hairs. Come what may, they are all you. They all represent a beautiful life that you have lived, lessons learned and loves that have come and gone. Look back at your past and find the beauty in it all. Even if it was hard, there was beauty there. Look back on days gone by in love and respect. Learn to love the past as well as the future.
Why stay looking in the rearview mirror
when the windshield is so much bigger?
Our futures can be the most amazing adventures of our lives WHEN we learn to look ahead. Live on purpose from this day forward. Enjoy the beauty in each day. Stop and breathe it in, Look at your spouse in a whole new light. Look at all the ways you both have changed together, look at the growth! Look at them and yourself through love goggles. Never sit there and pick yourself or another apart.
TRY THIS: “SELL” YOUR RELATIONSHIP
Just for fun you and your partner write a sales ad about your relationship (No peeking at each other’s papers). Be sure to include all of your great qualities and theirs, and why your relationship works! Explain why someone should “buy” your relationship. All the amazing things about it. What a great deal you are offering to someone! What is it worth? If you could package up the perfectness and the magic, how much could you sell it for? Of course, you don’t want to put down the bad things, only positive things! No one wants to buy a gassy snorer! List everything you can think of. Sell your spouse and yourself separately and then the magic of your relationship together. List each of your strengths, each of your magic. The great qualities you have learned over the years in your seasoned relationship! Make it good!
Swap papers when you are done. Are they the same? Do you see yourself the same way as your spouse does? Look at how different each of you sees your relationship! Are there qualities on one paper and not the other? Talk about it, laugh about it, learn the new qualities in your spouse that maybe you haven’t noticed, and learn the new qualities in yourself that you haven’t noticed too! Let us know what you come up with.